Before typing this post, I glanced back to see how often I have written on perspective in this blog. There were several and they were all different… not having a different perspective, but a different way I see perspective impacting our lives. Today, I want to take a look at perspective from the point of our own prejudices… and not the way you’re probably thinking. This is not about WOKE or race or gender or any other commonly discussed prejudice we may have. What I want to focus on today, is the raw and basic prejudice we all have… meaning we have pre-conceived idea in our mind and that idea impacts how we judge a particular moment in time.
The real aspect I want to focus on is the fact that we see what we’re looking for. I’ll give you an example but this is only the tip of the iceberg.
Once you either buy a car or start researching it to potentially own it… it seems like you suddenly see that car everywhere. Before it felt like there weren’t that many around but suddenly it’s the most common car in your daily commute. Now that you’re looking for that car, you see it WAY more often than you used to.
Every time we walk into a new situation, our minds begin to form an expectation of what we will experience. Depending on your set of circumstances, multiple people can walk into the same room and will observe completely different thing and have a totally different experience. Our mind is preparing us for the experience and the only way it can prepare us is based on the information it has. It’s why cops need to have so many different eye witnesses to something. They have to compare the stories to find common threads, which help them unpack the real story.
Take walking into a brand new church for the first time. I’ll describe the experience and then describe two different people having that experience… and you’ll begin to see what I’m talking about.
The visitor arrives on the property and sees a couple people directing cars in the parking lot. They then walk towards the building and are greeted by a couple people at the door, one just smiling and saying hi while the other hands the new visitor a welcome brochure about the church. The visitor engages in a little small talk as they make their way to the coffee bar for some morning caffeine. They continue into the larger room that says “sanctuary” above the door and are met with another person handing them yet another piece of paper, this time it’s the message notes. They head to an empty seat and the person in the seat in front of them turns around to say hi.
Now think of two different people with that experience. Person A is someone who is very familiar with church, they’ve been a long term member of another church and were very active in many volunteer roles, including greeter. They’re new in to town and impressed at the quality greeting taking place and feel instantly welcome and even pretty sure where they will volunteer to serve soon.
However, person B has never been to church. They’ve been going through a really rough time and heard they could maybe find answers at the local church. Every greeting made them feel a little more insecure, like they obviously stand out as new, an outsider. They just want to quietly sneak in but are greeted five times by the time they get to their seat. They’re uncomfortable and nervous and are telling themselves, “I knew I shouldn’t have come here this morning, now I’m trapped for the whole thing so I don’t stand out more by leaving early”.
The point is, the person’s past experiences and expectations can shape the impression, even though the experiences were identical. The problem is, this is our whole life. Every time we embark on something new, our brain is creating a narrative (based on our own experiences and expectations) of what we will experience… entering that new venture with a positive and open mind can allow you to have a great experience, whereas starting off the day expecting issues and problems… and you find exactly that, issues and problems.
Again, we will always see what we want to see. Jesus explained our ability to truly know Him is based on the same thing. In the sermon on the mount, right after talking about not judging others, Jesus says…
7 “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. – Matt 7:7-8
Jesus says you will find what you seek. It works for the person walking into a room full of strangers (they’ll either find new friends or anxiety) and it works for those looking into this Jesus thing. Someone trying to prove its all made up and fairytales, will find things that enhance that view… While others truly seeking answers and open to answers that are not what they expect, will find spiritual truth.
What are you looking for? Going into a new job, new church, new school, new environment… have you set yourself up for a good experience or a poor one. God is not surprised at your new set of circumstances, in fact… he may have even orchestrated them. So embrace where God has brought you, expect something amazing, ask to be guided by His spirit to remain in His good and perfect will… and you will find exactly what He has in store for you.